It appears there are several anonymous readers who do not, in fact, have a whole brain cell between them.
Here are three:
#1 "Wow stumbled upon this by accident! I feel sorry for this Ryan dude ...you sound extremely spoiled and bitchy and who the hell celebrates each month how long they have been married! I barely have time to think of one anniversary a year because Yes this is what the word anniversary means! Who lets spoiled immature people like you get married? Bad mouthing your husband so openly like this after only 11 months of marriage is pathetic! You will be divorced before you can celebrate 11 years!"
#2 "My friend who stumbled on this by accident sent me the link for a laugh. Lol, indeed. Give the guy a break. I mean, he's already facing a yearly reminder that he married an imbecile, does he really need one every month? I can't say I blame him for not wanting to wish with you--I don't think there's any nice way to say, "I wish my wife would stop being a moron." Good luck with that."
#3 "Oh SHUT UP! Today is my 3-year anniversary. As in, the actual anniversary of the date we got married three years ago. Though actually today marks the date TEN years ago that we first got together. I got my husband a nice watch, a bottle of Crown Royal Reserve, and a sweet card talking about how much I loved him. And what did I get? A big fat nothing. Not even a "Happy Anniversary." So excuse me if I don't have any patience to listen to you talk about not getting what you want for your 11-month anniversary. And by the way, count your lucky stars that you're able to use his credit card to buy new boots. That shit would absolutely not fly around here. And seeing as he didn't call you any four-letter names or hurl something at your head while this interaction was going on, you guys's conversation was NOT ALL THAT BAD. It was pretty normal, in fact. If anything you come off looking like a spoiled little brat for wanting to get your way about a made-up holiday, and then demanding to use his credit card. YOU HAVE A NORMAL HUSBAND. Enjoy that fact, and stop bitching. I guarantee you a lot more people have it WAY worse than you. Enjoy what you have. Your griping about this is making you look really petty and unattractive."
Our Slammed Blogger Says:
I chose not to respond on my blog, though a lot of my sweet Blogstalkers (what I call my readers) did respond for me. But if I did decide to justify the comments with a reply, this is what I would say. This is a humor blog. It is supposed to be ridiculous. And I can not stress enough the fact that this post was just a JOKE. Maybe not a very good one, but a joke nevertheless. I didn't try seriously to make my husband celebrate 11 months nor did I actually use his credit card (which is actually a joint account) to purchase myself a gift. That would be ridiculous. My husband and I love each other very much and he supports my blog wholeheartedly. He understands my inane sense of humor, which you all obviously do not. And that is just fine, truly. What is not fine, and I think most people would agree, is calling someone you do not know spoiled and bitchy and pathetic. You label me immature and ask who let me get married. My answer is this, I made the decision myself thank you very much, as I am an adult. You, in my opinion, are the ones that are being immature, calling someone you again, do not even know, an imbecile and a moron. For what is the purpose of this? It is hurtful and downright mean. Oh and as far as your prediction that my husband and I will not be together after 11 years? We actually hit ten years together in January and we're still going strong. And you know what? We celebrated our ten year dating anniversary even though we're married now and should start over. Because to us, it was a milestone and we both wanted to commemorate the occasion in some small way. For your sake(s) I hope that you were just having a bad day when you commented. For it would be trying, I think, to go through life in such a resentful and it seems (though I wouldn't know as I do not know you) bitter way. Oh, and if my husband called made a habit of calling me names and hurling things at my head? He wouldn't be my husband any longer. Just saying.
This is truly stupid. Let's examine their comments, shall we?
#1 - "...who the hell celebrates each month how long they have been married!"
Um, people who love each other and view each day as a gift..? People who look to celebrate the little moments in life...?
"...I barely have time to think of one anniversary a year..."
Gee. Your spouse must feel so fortunate and special!
#2 - "I mean, he's already facing a yearly reminder that he married an imbecile, does he really need one every month?"
You're just a Jack-Ass.
#3 - "And what did I get? A big fat nothing. Not even a "Happy Anniversary." "YOU HAVE A NORMAL HUSBAND." "I guarantee you a lot more people have it WAY worse than you."
Oh honey, I think there is a better than average chance that you are married to Anonymous Commenter #1. If your spouse is a Normal Husband, I am glad that mine is abnormal.
It's obvious that Lauren's blog is just good, snarky fun. It's also obvious that her husband has every bit as much snark as she does and they play off of each other and with each other. Couples who can both dish it up AND take it are more likely to remain happily married. These commenters may be anonymous, but I think we all got some great insights into the states of their marriages, didn't we?
What do you say?