Tuesday, May 3, 2011

And You Thought Your Mother In Law Was Bad….

One of our really great friends on twitter sent us this email.  She has asked to remain Anonymous for reasons that you shall be made very aware of.

The Slammed Blogger Says:
I had a blog... I no longer have that blog thanks to my psycho mother- in-law.

Seriously.  She.is.evil.

I started a blog about my happy little family, decorating, creating, crafting, cooking...basically everything I love.  I had a pretty good little following for only having been around a few months.  Well.  My in-laws are crazy, mean people.  Not quite sure how my husband turned out like he did. 
Back to the blog.  When I decided to start my blog, I also decided to block my sister-in-law on Facebook because I didn't want her to share my blog with anyone in their family ( mostly because I feel like the only way to avoid snide, hateful comments from them is to avoid them at all costs.)  So at first I blocked her ( or so I thought) so I would post my links to FB so my friends and family could visit the blog.  Well, apparently I never clicked the block button and she was able to view my blog.  Of course, she sent it to EVERYONE in their family and they were all (unbeknownst to me) stalking it daily.  Well one day I did a post about how I would not be visiting them over a weekend and that my son and I would have the weekend to bond and have a little fun.  ( He had a double ear infection and I ended up with a stomach virus-so neither of us would have done well on a 6 hour car trip)  Well about 2 weeks later ... I get a comment made from an email address from my MIL's company that says.  "Too late all the in-laws have already read this and we know you are a liar."  Pretty sweet huh?  Then she went on to leave comments under craft posts that I had done that said "stupid"  "ugly" etc.  She went back and deleted those, but my email sure did save them for me to see.

Before you judge me for trying to keep my in-laws at a distance let me tell you a few little stories.

1. Before I graduated from college, she told me "I can't believe you wasted your education on over-paid babysitting."  ( I am a teacher)

2. When we got engaged there was no congratulations, I was told " You better not mess up his life" ( we both had jobs, college degrees and we had bought a beautiful home together, we had also been together 4 years)  She went right out and got a bigger diamond for her ring so that mine would not be bigger than hers.

3. She insisted on paying for the DJ for our formal evening wedding but our cost limit was $500.00 and she never signed the contract.  So a month before the wedding she called and blamed my husband for it. When I nicely and calmly said "Don't worry about, it I will call my mom and we will take care of it."  She called me ( and my mom)  "Stuck up snotty Bi*&%es."  Then REFUSED to apologize for it.
 
4. At said wedding she literally stomped her feet and threw a screaming fit IN THE CHURCH over pictures she wanted taken ( but didn't pay a dime for)

5.  When I was pregnant she asked me what our names were for the baby and I proceeded to tell her both girl and boy names and she promptly told me " if you name a girl that I will make fun of her every time I see her.  A name like that deserves to be made fun of."

6.  When she visited my brand new baby who had no immune system in the hospital, she had a fever. She didn't bother to tell me that until she was holding the baby.

7.  During the first year of my child's life she NEVER once came to visit him ( she lives an hour away)  Then badmouths us for not driving 6 hours to see her extended family?

AND that my friends was the last straw.  You mess with my kid?  I am DONE with you.  So guess what?  I don't care what she thinks of me.... I am a nice person with a good heart and she can trash me all she wants to whomever she wants.  Because I have a wonderful family, and that is what matters.

And you know what I have to say to her?  Nothing.  Talking to her would be a waste of my breath.

Although I would love to tell her she should see a doctor about Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I closed my  old blog down, got off Facebook completely and have started fresh with a new blog... and I have yet to receive on mean comment on it :) 

(BOO-YAH)

Mandi Says:
Wow.  I am pretty much speechless.  Is her name by chance Luci…fer? She has got some big issues and you probably should keep your happy fam away from her claws.  And good for you for starting another blog!

Viv Says:
This is one of those times when I wish Dr. Freud was still on call.  I think the Slammed Blogger hit the nail on the head when she talked about narcissism... but I think she may have the added bonus of a true sociopath for a mother-in-law.     Let's discuss some sociopathic tendencies, mkay?  
Anti-social behavior?  Check!
Lacking a sense of moral responsibility?  Check!
Social conscience isn't what it should be?  Check!
Ridiculous notions of entitlement? Check!
Impulsive...? Superficial...?  Manipulative...? Check! Check! and Check!

For reals, go here if you think I am kidding. 

I'm glad our Slammed Blogger started another blog.  She needs a good pen name, but she for sure needs an outlet for her creativity... and a way to get her MIL stories off her chest.   Keep it up.  Keep writing, keep creating and keep that whack-a-doo away from your precious family.  You are under NO obligation to this woman.  She lost her chance for a nice relationship with her son's wife and child.  
(And even if you did keep extending an olive branch... she's a sociopath and would just take it and beat you with it...)




What Do You Say?

33 comments:

red.neck chic said...

I say... I feel your pain girl - and am SO proud of you for starting a new one which I will promptly stalk with only nice comments.

I banned my mother from mine - right after she called me tacky, trashy and just plain stupid.

I don't like her - why can't she at least be an in-law?

Okay - I'm off to stalk with nice things to say 'cause I think YOU ROCK!

;-D robelyn

kamcicle said...

sadly there's no treatment for narcisissm....and if there was, those with who have NPD would just think they invented it...just ask donald trump!

Carmella said...

Wow...I guess I can cut my mother-in-law some slack now...she only does things like remind me of everything under the sun that could possibly, maybe, one in a million chance, might not ever happen but I'll still tell you about it anyway...things that could kill a baby. My "babies" are now 6 and 4....and I still hear these things!!
Good for you for starting a new blog...we all need a creative outlet and her craziness (even if it is imposed on you) has nothing to do with you...she, in my professional opinion is just plain crazy!
whew...now I feel better too :)

Jessica @ My World - Made By Hand said...

WOWSAS! WOW! HOLY MOLY! WOWSAS!

Seriously, I don't even know what else to say! Well, and YUCK! And maybe EWE!

I'm glad she started another blog...can't let people like that bring ya down.

Elizabeth said...

WOW. My MIL once called me 'spoiled' in front of my hubby and about 8 of our friends. She repeated it twice just to make sure *everyone* heard.

I have no clue why she said it either, it just came out of the blue. At the time she said it, my hubby & I were living in a house that had been under major DIY construction for over a year, didn't have kitchen counters, flooring, or drywall. We didn't have a kitchen sink, so we had to do dishes in the bath tub for 8 months. We drove a 12 year old car to bring our dirty laundry to the launrdomat and worry we were gonna get jumped by the crack heads for our pocket full-o-quarters.

If that's what you consider 'spoiled' well then call me Veruca Salt.

Oh, and the spammed blogger shouldn't feel too bad about the outburst at her wedding. My M-O-(dis)H / best friend of 20 years ruined my wedding day. At the time she was married and tried desperately to 'hook up' (I'm putting that nicely/PG rated) with one of the groomsmen... while her husband, 2 year old son and the entire wedding watched in disbelief. Needless to say, we don't talk anymore.

Ok, I'm done ranting : )

Good Time Charlie said...

Wow, this is like something out of a bad TV show. I can't believe this is your real life. So good for you that you have blocked such toxic people from your family. Eeeewwwww though. That stinks. The world is full of crazy. BTW, I am bookmarking that page on how to tell if someone is a sociopath. I think I know a few.

Judy C said...

I am a mother-in-law. I try to remember that the spouses are the people my children love. Hurting them wouldn't occur to me.

I think the MIL in question is a crazy-a__-_itch. Could there ever be a better way to lose her son?

Jessa Smith said...

Yikes! Good call on cutting her out of your life! Even if she is family, comments like that shouldn't be tolerated. What does your husband think of her? I'd be mortified if that was my family.

Congrats on the new blog and NOT informing the family about it!

Melissa O said...

This makes me uber sad. I feel completely blessed for the my inlaws. All of them. Especially after this. There must be some seriously things going on in the MIL life that she felt like treating someone like that. Note to self: Don't ever be a mother in law like that.

(my kids are under the age of 12 but I still thought the note to self was necessary)

MiMi said...

Ummm...I'm just speechless.

Olive Cooper said...

That blogger is right. Her MIL is evil and most certainly has Borderline Personality Disorder because everything is about her. My husbands grown children hate us and do not speak to us for similar reasons and we are fine with that because he has done nothing except decided to be happy. People like the MIL make life miserable and they are best out of your life. I am so glad she has another blog now

Erin said...

I say I feel sorry for the MIL. Could you imagine living a life so caught up in misery and hatred that it caused you to act that way?? I think this blogger is a great person(wish I knew ya, I'd follow you for certain) and the fact that she is looking after her own little family-at any costs(going underground kinda) is a girl after my own heart. I am giving you a hug blogger, you are a good person and mature too. AS for your MIL, well, I am giving her a hug too...someone like that needs some love, maybe some therapy too, or at least some medication??? Good call on the sociopath VIV.

scarlettred41816@aol.com said...

You are a ANGEL for putting up with them in the first place. But enough is enough! Good for you for starting over honey!! MY first MIL asked my OBGYN how much I paid him to say I was pregnant! And that was the nicest thing she ever did for me lol. She killed my first marriage. I hope you can withstand the evil in yours. Kick them out of your life hon. Thats all I can say, coz been there done that.

Karri said...

And I thought my MIL and her passive aggressiveness was bad. Hot damn...you take the cake.

Patti said...

CAN YOU PUHLEEEZE check and see it this blogger and I are maybe married to the same person! ; )

Heather said...

I will never say another bad thing about my MIL. Ok, well that's going to extremes, but I will try not to say the things as often. :)

My MIL is one of those who knows everything about everything and if you don't do it her way then you're wrong, very wrong and she will tell you that every single time you talk to her. Altho I think the funniest (funny now, 8 years later) is that she wore an off white sparkling dress to our wedding. It was the same shade of white as my wedding dress.

Luckily, the hubs gets as annoyed or more annoyed with her than I do, so at least I have an ally.

Decorchick! said...

WOW, WOW, WOW!!! That is pure evil. Sorry. And Mandi, you CRACKED me up with Luci...fer. Good one.

(Queenmothermamaw) Peggy said...

Wow I am a MIL. I think I get along with all my sons and daughters in law. Who knows. I am so sorry you have to deal with that. Blessings
QMM

clearness said...

Just keep doing right by your family and one day she will see that you are a good person. She might not ever treat you right, but when she's so old and senile she can't do a thing but lay there and be a vegetable, step in and treat her right and well, I'm sure that will make her feel awful for how she's treating you now.

That one girl said...

Ugh, I'm soooo sorry!

My MIL is awesome but YOUR MIL sounds like my REAL mom. You didn't marry my brother did you? Some people are terrible!

Jayna Rae said...

WOW! I think Viv covered it all.

Michelle said...

Turn and run. Yikes. I shall never complain about my MIL again. I'm glad you got back in to blogging! Don't let her take that from you!

Coupon Queen said...

Holy cow!! I stumbled across your blog and really, how could I not stop and read it, its kinda like watching Jerry Springer, you KNOW its bad but you just have to see HOW bad! Have you thought about going on Springer? Just kidding. I thought my MIL was bad when she asked my husband what I do for him since he cooks and cleans (which I do too), she assumes I don't do anything but eat bon bons all day. I am now following and hoping there are more happy stories to follow! Have a fantastic week.

Lyssa said...

Wow what a trooper for dealing with that family. That would be so hard! But that women will rot. period.
Mandi, I seriously laughed out loud .."is her name Luci..fer?
hilarious.
Geez, after reading this, my MIL and family are saints compared to this woman!

Jennifer said...

I think there should be a club for women who have sucky IL's. My IL's didn't go to our wedding reception that was a month after our small intimate wedding because they said they didn't want people talking about them. We went to Thanksgiving at their house and my FIL, SIL and BIL wouldn't even come out of their rooms to speak to us. We invited them for Christmas and they said they would come, then the day of they said that they made other plans. On our first anniversary my MIL tried to commit suicide and then blamed it on us getting married and her not seeing her son enough. My FIL told me in an email that I was a third party and had no relevance to him or his family and he would not ever talk to me. And all that stuff happened in just the 1st year of our marriage. We've been married almost 5 years. I now no longer speak to my IL's or force my husband to speak to them either. Life is much better without their drama.

Ashley Poulsen said...

This post made me want to laugh and cry at the same time. I don't have the best relationship with my in laws, but man oh man... it's heaven compared! I'm so sorry!

Danee said...

My mother in law isn't as bad but has said some doozie's herself. Why are they so hateful? Once my husband had it out with her on the phone- which he had on speaker and she did't know- and I heard all the stupid crap she blamed on me. Ridiculous.

Hold firm and ignore the crazies. They are immature and mean idiots who don't deserve to know your children. I would recommend making your husband do all communications with his family and make it clear that anybody who would tease a child "overtime I see her" is just a complete Jack**** (and I dont mean a type of "rabbit"). Hold strong!

Honey said...

Wow. I think my inlaws have identical twins. Are you living my life?
-Before our wedding my mom who was dying of cancer and passed weeks later received a call from my husband's aunt. She cussed my mom out because she and dad weren't paying for the wedding. Dad was fired after almost 16 yrs and she needed daily help. Mom cried and never told me. My aunt passed on the news.
-At the church my future BIL & SIL were 2 hours late bringing me my crinoline MIL had hemmed.
-My MIL called childrens services because I put my son in the corner as it was cruel and I should have spanked him. He was 4. CPS dropped all charges while I spoke with them on the phone over allegations and she picked up the phone and started running her mouth at me. They recommended a character defamation suit.
-MIL told me & DH she hated me and had since the first time she met me.
-After 9 miscarriages I was 7months along with my 3rd. They couldn't find a heartbeat and sent me to the hospital. We basically threw kids out at MIL's house and left expecting an er cesarean. Babe was ok. Get back but MIL took my kids who should have been in a carseat and a booster to pick up my nieces cheerleading pics WITHOUT CARSEATS clear across town. She never asked if the baby was ok and called me a B*tch for being angry about the carseats. I lost it and crawled in the van to kick her butt but DH pulled me out.
-One miscarriage happened very late in my 1st trimester. We attended a mass service for parents of lost children. I asked MIL to attend and she refused because it was creepy. She decorates graves each holiday and on the passed persons bday and picnics in cemeteries but a funeral for our child was creepy.
-Her other grandchildren spend 1-3 nights a week with her, she puts and gets them off the bus daily but she wouldn't watch our children for 1 hour while DH got off work and I started school. But! she watched niece n nephew so old SIL could go to night college daily from 5-9 & Sat.
-She's never remembered our anniversary or my bday and never helped my kids make me a mother's day gift but ex sil (who cheated on and literally LEFT my BIL and niece and nephew) STILL gets a Mother's and Bday gift. And she keeps the kids for ex SIL ALL THE TIME.
-She's referred to me so many times as "the red headed hussy who stole her son." that my middle knows it.
-She informed me when I was having an issue nursing my 1st born that SHE could still lactate. It was SO Hand That Rocks The Cradle and I have nursed a friends babe when she was hospitalized so it wasn't that but the crazy look.
-And she delights in 'sharing' all she does for ex SIL & BIL when we visit them.

I wish I could say I was a better person and didn't remember all this but every time shes refused to help us a bit but would help her other son tons...it just tears you to shreds. Especially when your 12 year old asks why Mamal loves his cousins more than them.

Fellow sister...I know what it feels like. Call if you need to vent ;)

Honey

Jen-CraftOManiac said...

WOW! i FEEL SO BAD for the DIL. I also feel so bad because I have the dreamiest MIL ever, I adore her and she raised a great man my hublet. ;)

Thomas and Jamie said...

I say it sounds like my husband has a brother and I have another sister in law that we never knew about because we MUST be talking about the same in-laws!!! My son is 3...my mother in law lives 15 minutes away...she's seen him twice. Once when he was born, once when we took him to see her after his 6 week checkup. She told us no, she didn't want to see him once after that and I said ENOUGH! To top it off...my sister-in-law flipped us off in our wedding pictures and, about 12 weeks after I had my son, she physically assaulted me and the rest of the family supported HER. So yeah - we MUST be talking about the same people!!!

Kelsey said...

I'm speechless! I am so sad for the horrible things the blogger has gone thru at the hands of a woman who should treasure her! You were right to ban her from your life! She's a freak and should have no part of you or your kids lives! I am also so sad to read these other horror stories in the comments...you guys have HORRIBLE In laws! You guys all have my prayers! I will try not to complain about my passive agressive fake mother in law as much now!

melissa said...

Wow...and I thank god every day that my mom in law and myself are super close.

Jill Sink said...

Im doing a lot of research about narcissist/ sociopath mother in law. AS I call mine Hitler! There isnt a long enuff pgs for all this so called mother of my husband has done to me, and her never ending target twds me, her dream is to have all of her family to hate me even kids (nephews and even my step children), and Most of all wants my husband of 18 yrs to Hate me! But SHE WILL NOT GIVE ME A REASON WHY! So I totally understand the statements above, its sad that hitler and I were (or so I thought) friends at one point of time. But she has told me that I am her target til the day one of us dies! She HATES that my husband is on my side, when he did finally open his eyes! All she has done is pushed everyone out of her narcissist life! She has told me and truly believes she is G-O-D! She is perfect. I like to kno more bout the triggers of narcissists/sociopaths. Why target someone that hasn't done anything to them!!??? She is loaded w/money and has riped off mine and my husband money and ruined our credit up to 50 grand.sovery curious and need help of her LEAVEING ME/HUB ALONE!!! 5 yrs of pure torture and lies on fb and to ffamily members is enough!! Good luck to everyone! And im glad im NOT alone!